stacking the deck

With all the new changes in my life (namly the new job and future move to the valley as discussed in the previous post), I think it’s about time for me to start fresh all together.

Butt has been calling me all week trying to set up our next meeting, but finals and other stress has kept me busy. Besides, it’s time for some new buddies anyway. The valley is too far to keep my current flings alive. Truthworthy might be the only exception as he is superbly talented when he is on his knees. He came over last week to remind me of exactly why I continue to see him semi-regularly.

The whole idea of this move has been the catalyst for brainstorming and planning for my future. I’m now starting to save for my first home, my retirement plan is finally getting some attention, and my debt will be accounted for fairly soon as well. So what’s missing? A life partner.

I must admit that I have been avoiding personal relationships in favor of carefree sex and a reliable group of friends. This has worked well for me during the last few years which follows the demise of my relationship with The roommate. We were together for 3 years, and somehow during that short stint, my skepticism has increased tremendously. I have to avoid catching feelings, because I tend to fall too easily- and once I’m in love… I’m like puddy. The problem is that too often I fall for the wrong guys (and girls here and there) and end up on the floor clutching my chest trying to alleviate the heart palpitations. That gets old. I’d rather not trust anyone, which has been a viable solution until now. I want a personal connection again.

Am I ready for that? Time will tell.

Since everything is about the future now, I’m not going to finish the story of
truthworthy and the roommate as it no longer defines my situation. Instead, I’m going to look forward to searching for a life partner, enjoying new fuck buds along the way.